Some Healthy Competition
by akiismarina
Summary: The men of the Weasley family are cursed! Every generation, when the youngest of brothers turns 21, his unmarried brothers are doomed to fall for the same girl.Only fate would have such a cruel sense of humor to make Hermione that woman this time. Now they must watch with baited breath to see who she'll fall for George, Percy or Charlie? Dedicated to the brilliant unicorn982001
1. Chapter 1

_This is dedicated to unicorn982001, who was generous enough to share such a wonderful story idea and give me the honor of writing, and the freedom to be as creative as my potentially less than sane mind pleased!_

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**Chapter One**

Percy threw own his quill in exasperation, "_Darn it all… how the __**heck**__ am I supposed to finish the report with all noise_?" The former Head Boy's deeply ingrained values of rules and all things proper prevented him from cursing even within his own mind. Pale blue eyes lightening and flashing with anger at being interrupted yet again, he picked up his quill and placed it just so on his desk to await his return from telling the **children** downstairs to keep it down. Naturally, he paused long enough to fix his appearance, putting on a sweater of his plain white tee-shirt and combing his hair. He wore jeans, for the sake of comfort during the long hours at his desk, and slipped his house shoes onto his sock encased feet on his way to the door.

He galloped down the stairs two at a time, continuing the report in his mind so he'd know exactly what to write and minimize his time lost. Half a minute later, he was making his way down the second floor stair case, so enraptured in his report that he was silently dictating what he was going to write, complete with surprisingly animated facial expressions and hand gestures for someone writing about how long and point a quill's tip ought to be. Half a second later his foot hit a trick step set by the twins, which instantly rocketed him forward. Unbeknownst to him, in his brief moment of flight an additional part to the twins' little prank commenced, effectively transfiguring him into a rather feminine version of himself. Moments later he did a full body face-plant on the wall, somehow flipped upside-down, and slid down it until the top of his head tapped lightly on the floor. Then his entire body collapsed into a heap on the floor. Somewhere Jerry the mouse was giving a standing ovation.

Gritting his teeth, red with anger, he to the kitchen and entered the room with a deep breath, his finger pointing riotously and mouth agape, ready to let loose at the idiots he had the misfortune of calling brothers. All that flew out the window when the kitchen's lone, very female and very **not** ginger, occupant turned to him with a small but startled gasp and wide eyes. Much to his embarrassment the only thing he seemed to be able to force passed his own surprised lips was a weak squeak before he slowly shut his mouth and lowered the offending finger.

"Hello there," Hermione's tone was careful as she eyed him oddly.

"Good morning," he responded, still rooted to his place in the doorway, his mind shamefully idle as he scrambled to redirect from his planned tirade.

"Can… can I… **help** you?" her tone remained unchanged as she obviously struggled to figure out what to say. "Miss…?" She quickly tacked on, halting Percy from demanding to see Fred and George.

Suddenly filled with a growing sense of dread, Percy stared blankly at Hermione, who gave him an odd look back as she slowly craned her neck forward and parted her lips with a small nod or two as she silently prompted him for his name. slowly he looked down and saw two small feet dwarfed in his socks and shoes, a pair of legs slightly thinner than they ought to be hips only marginally wider and rounder than normal, a flat and what he assumed was softer stomach under his sweater, and two tiny bumps where there should be nothing. With a shaking hand, he reached up to feel his formally neat, respectable hair was a long and tangled mess. Without warning, he screamed, his new highly pitched voice serving to only further to further spook him. The sound of a second scream joining his own made him ump, causing Hermione to jump too. They continued like that for another few seconds, each scaring the other, which in turn only scared them even more.

"I'm going to kill them!" Percy finally articulated in nothing less than a shriek.

"Oh God please no!" Hermione crouched into a ball against the counter.

"Not **you**! **Fred and George**," he snapped back irritably.

"Oh please don't! I'm sure they didn't mean it. Can't we just talk about it Miss?" Hermione pleaded, still crouched nervously.

"Stop calling me that, I'm not a woman!"

Hermione opened her mouth and froze, not sure what to say. Homicidal maniacs she could deal with, she was used to them, they were normal. A woman that was obviously a woman, insisting she wasn't a woman was new, unusual ad out of her scope of abilities. She stared at the stranger, meeting her angry gaze. She crinkled her nose, just like she always did when deep in thought and concentrating hard. There was something familiar about her eyes…

"Percy?" Hermione whispered. Her eyes lit up as she finally put all the pieces together.

"Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to find the twin demons and demand they fix well…" he gestured up and down his body.

"Why give them the satisfaction?' Hermione asked, referring to Fred and George's hobby of pranking their brothers and then never letting them live it down. "Why not just let me do it for you? And if anyone says anything we'll just pretend to be none the wiser."

Percy visibly hesitated, wavering in the doorway. Hermione pulled out a chair from the table and lightly patted the back, shooting him her most beguiling smiling. Finally deciding that the private semi-friendship they'd developed entailed enough trust to allowed the talented witch help **and** keep this a secrete, he sat stiffly in the chair.

He closed him eyes and steeled himself against the discomfort as she began to transfigure him back to normal. In his mind, he could see her crinkle her nose as she waved her wand in complex patterns to fix his appearance bit-by-bit. His mind began to wonder as he thought to the strange mix of envy and respect his mind began to wonder as he thought to the strange mix of envy and respect he always seemed to feel toward her. They were undeniably similar people, and probably would have been more alike if not for her friends, so it seemed natural they'd get along. He couldn't help but envy how easy success, friendship, recognition, and respect all come to her. Picture perfect friends and family. It hardly seemed fair. But then he thought about how studious, kind, and generally good of a person she was. And it was impossible to not respect that. Much more than anyone realized… or he'd admit to.

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_ **Reviews make the pen flow faster...**_


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

"Okay, I'm done…though you may want to get your hair trimmed. I left it a little longer than normal so you could cut it the way you want," Hermione's voice drew Percy from his thoughts. He opened his eyes to see Hermione pouring light herbal tea. Two cups; they never denied each other what little private time they may come across as a testament to their strange little friendship.

"They do it on purpose you know," he finally spoke again. "The trick step I mean, they know you the only one who lets their thoughts take over to the point of forgetting every single time that they **always** booby-trap the **same exact step**," Hermione slowly delivered the carefully enunciated words to drive her point home.

"That doesn't justify it," Percy was quick to reply. His undoubted soon to follow rant was quickly cut off by Hermione.

"No but surely you can understand **why** they do it," Hermione stood leaning against the counter, staring at the kettle; she was well aware of Percy's unwavering gaze; just as he was well aware that her lack of eye-contact was less a sign of lack of interest, and more of a sign of thought of her part. He didn't bother to respond, knowing any of his answers would be responded to with a cutting retort. "You spend nearly all your time holed up, working. The only time your family sees you is meals, when all you do is talk about work, or when you come storming down to demand quiet so you can do more work.

"So they just get away with it every time," Percy's voice took on the barest whiny tone as he leaned back and crossed his arms over his chest irritably. "I'm **trying** to finish this report by tonight and get it into my boss."

Hermione glanced over at Percy and rolled her eyes, making the scowl on his face deepen. "_What is it with Weasley men and pouting?_"

"I don't even know why we're having this party. So Ron's turning twenty-one… big whoop. It's not that big of a deal. He's been an Auror for **years** and he and Luna married two years ago, in case you've forgotten," Percy's voice took on a sarcastic edge, as he once again bemoaned the overabundance of hustle and bustle the past few weeks due to party preparations. "And hey baby shower was weeks ago too," he added in a childish attempt to further prove his point.

"I don't know," Hermione wisely choose not to address the jealous note in his voice. She'd long since figured out his superiority complex with his family, Harry, and even her; she didn't blame him for the way he felt, though she did wish she could help. "Your parents keep saying something about some sort of tradition… but they certainly are being mysterious about it all. Whatever is going on, they want you all there. They even pitched a fit until Charlie promised to take temporary leave to come for a visit," Hermione updated Percy to the happenings in his own family yet again.

"Still," the grumble was the only response she received. Sh3 sighed, patiently ignoring his antics as she poured the now boiling water into the two cups to seep. They fell into companionable silence as they waited for the tea leaves to finish soaking. A minute late Hermione removed them and stirred in some honey.

"Did you mean the report on quill tips?" She asked as she carefully transported the cups to the table.

Percy nodded, and then realized she wasn't looking at him and said, "Yeah." He'd already told her all about it, so he didn't bother repeating all the details; she was the only one who was ever bother to ask about his work, or even show the most minute of interest in it.

"Isn't that due next week?" Once again he nodded, but remained silent; the question was mostly rhetoric though, since Hermione never forgets due dates. "So… why are you trying to finish it today? It doesn't sound like you to rush and risk the work's quality and integrity." She gazed directly at him as she handed him a cup. He took it from her carefully, keeping his eyes trained on the cup with the utmost concentration as he carefully placed it down on the table without spilling a drop. Hermione eyed him as she sat in her own seat across the table; his eyes remained rooted on the cup and his face was passive as ever. Except for the telltale blush reddening his ears.

"So what's her name?" Hermione asked simply, a broad grin spreading across her face as Percy turned even redder.

"Lucille, but everyone just calls her Lucy," Percy didn't even bother trying to deny it as a bright smile spread across his face as he said he name. His heart felt heavy and filled with joy, butterflies filling his stomach just at saying the name out loud to someone so close to him… it made the whole thing seem so much more real.

"I always thought Lucille was a beautiful name," Hermione smiled even wider in response. "So tell me, is she as pretty as her name?" She sipped her tea casually, despite the slightly giddy atmosphere.

"**More**," Percy ran his thumb over the rim of the cup, unable to stop smiling despite the steady ache growing in his cheeks. He suddenly looked up and met Hermione's eyes directly, his own light blue eyes holding a new sparkle, startling her somewhat. "She's tall for a woman, only slightly short than me, so maybe… around 5'9 *, thin with brown eyes and her hair…" Percy trailed off, his smile widening. "I've never found red hair attractive, but hers has all these different tones and these cute curls…"

Hermione sipped her tea some more, giving him a chance to continue. When he didn't, she asked, "What does she do? You hardly are the type to date a coworker."

"She's a nurse at Saint Camillus de Lellis," he responded, proudly naming a prestigious hospice and long-term care facility for the chronically ill.

"Not an easy job," Hermione raised her eyebrows, impressed. Entering the medical field was easily two or three times harder in the wizarding world due to the added complexity of all the various magical components that come into play. She could hardly imagine the emotional toll such a place took too.

"I met her by chance. We go to the same little shop for lunch," Percy no longer needed prompting, seemingly happy to talk about her freely now.

"That new one?" she asked, remembering him mentioning it a while ago. He nodded, looking back down.

"I know… taking a month to ask someone I see five days a week out is pretty pathetic," he turned red again, he face now a mask of pained shame as he stared at his cup again. Hermione reached out and lightly touched his wrist.

"No if you finally get up the courage to try. Especially not when she says yes," Hermione knew she'd said the right thing when Percy grasped her hand and met her gaze again, his blush subsiding slightly.

"I'm going to take her to Lorenzo's," Percy gripped her hand, the only outward sign of his anxiety, "tonight at eight. I made reservations… figured it'd be more romantic later in the evening. I asked around and they turn the lights down real low and light candles on everyone's tables. There will even be a live smooth jazz band playing tonight."

"Sounds perfect," Hermione declared honestly, causing Percy to relax, relieved. "Not overly expensive for a first date, but expensive and classy enough to a very good first impression. The menu has everything from traditional delicacies to basic spaghettis to high-brow specialties, so options of what to order won't be a problem… and it'll be a perfect excuse to strut your stuff, and women just love seeing men dressed up. Plus, every woman loves a chance to dress up a bit and show herself off."

"I shall be bringing flowers for her too, of course," Percy added now eager for her detailed insight.

"Don't bother," Hermione murmured after thinking for a moment. "Too cumbersome, especially for the environment and mood."

"So… no flowers?" Percy asked carefully, clearly confused at her decision.

"No… just one flower. A red rose… a perfect one with a life and health enhancement charm… waiting at her placement at the table," Hermione smiled, satisfied at the idea. "Correspond with the restaurant to have a small vase to put in after you arrive… and you can have it sitting across her plate until you get there… just make sure it doesn't take up too much space and get in the way. The vase I mean, not the flower."

"I could go out and do it later but…" Percy hesitated.

"I'll cover for you," Hermione quickly understood. "As far as anyone here will know, your entire day… afternoon… evening… and night was all spent in your room alone, working. The door locked, curtains closed, and silencing charms all cast. After all, you have a demanding job, and really must be able to concentrate in private," Hermione grinned at him, quoting him directly at that lat part. "And if you need help sneaking in, just go to the swing out back. I'll put a charm on it later to make my wand vibrate when you touch your wand to it," she levitated their empty cups to the sink to be washed later, "now, go on up to your room and do exactly what I said and get that report done."

"Thank you," Percy gave her an uncharacteristic hug as they stood, and hurried out of the room, this time remembering to hop over the trick step.

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(AN: *I'm sorry, but I couldn't find a proper conversion of this into the metric system. Also, I posted this pretty quickly because I'm in the middle of finals week, and more or less dying, and will be working at my dreaded job all weekend, so I may not get to type up another chapter until sometime next week)

**_Reviews make the pen flow faster..._**


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